This thing, bless it, is neither use nor ornament. The yarn is too thin to make a decent tea cosy and the colours and pattern are far from an exact match for the real Jayne Hat but I wanted a Jayne Hat tea cosy so I made one regardless!
I've never tried to write a pattern before (or knit a tea cosy for that matter), and to misquote Sheppard Book it's fair to say I haven't yet! For anyone who wants to know here's what I did and what I did it with.
Yarn Robin DK 100% acrylic in yellow, orange and red (it's what I had after doing some rainbow stuff.)
Cast on 42st in orange and work in 2x2 rib for 8 rows
Row 1, k to end
Row 2, K2, P to last 2 st
Repeat until ten rows of st st have been completed, change to yellow yarn and continue in pattern for a further 10 rows. Bunch this piece up on the end of your needle and on the same needle cast on another 42 st in orange and knit to match the first side.
When second side is complete knit across the two pieces then purl one row. Complete a further two rows in normal stocking stitch.
I decreased as follows;
K1, (K2tog,K9)to end
Three rows st st (Purl every wrong side row)
K1, (K3tog,K7)to end
K1, (K3tog,K5)to end
K1, (K2tog,K4)to end
K1, (K2tog,K3)to end
K1, (K2tog,K2)to end
K1, (K2tog,K1)to end
Instead of normal P row P2tog to end and run end of yarn through stitches to finish. Sew ribbing together and sew in ends.
For ear flaps (make 2)
Co 14 and work 28 rows as follows
Row 1, K to end
Row 2, K1, P to last stitch, K1
To Dec, continue in pattern but dec 1 stitch at each end of next (r side) and following 2 alternate rows. Cast off and sew to the inside of the 'hat'. Bung it on your teapot!